老友记第一季第一集 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate.docx
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老友记第一季第一集 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate.docx
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老友记第一季第一集TheOneWhereMonicaGetsaNewRoommate
101TheOneWhereMonicaGetsaNewRoommate莫妮卡的新室友(133单词)
(ThePilot-TheUncutVersion)
[Scene:
CentralPerk,Chandler,Joey,Phoebe,andMonicaarethere.]
Monica:
There'snothingtotell!
He'sjustsomeguyIworkwith!
没什么好说的!
他不过是我的同事!
Joey:
C'mon,you'regoingoutwiththeguy!
There'sgottabesomethingwrongwithhim!
少来了,你和那个人一起出去!
和你交往的男人一定有问题!
Chandler:
AllrightJoey,benice. Sodoeshehaveahump?
Ahumpandahairpiece?
打住,乔伊,嘴下留德。
他驼背?
既驼背又带假发?
Phoebe:
Wait,doesheeatchalk?
慢着,他吃粉笔吗?
(Theyallstare,bemused.)
Phoebe:
Just,'cause,Idon'twanthertogothroughwhatIwentthroughwithCarl-oh!
我只是不想你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙
Monica:
Okay,everybodyrelax.Thisisnotevenadate.It'sjusttwopeoplegoingouttodinnerand-nothavingsex.
各位别急,这不算约会,我们不过是出去吃晚餐,而且不做爱。
Chandler:
Soundslikeadatetome.听起来好像是说我的约会
[TimeLapse]
Chandler:
Alright,soI'mbackinhighschool,I'mstandinginthemiddleofthecafeteria,andIrealizeIamtotallynaked.
记得中学时代的梦,我站在自助餐厅。
突然发现自己全身赤裸
All:
Oh,yeah.Hadthatdream.我做过那样的梦
Chandler:
ThenIlookdown,andIrealizethere'saphone...there.
我低头一看,看见有一支电话…
Joey:
Insteadof...?
在那儿,而不是…?
Chandler:
That'sright.-没错
Joey:
Neverhadthatdream.我没做过那样的梦
Phoebe:
No.
Chandler:
Allofasudden,thephonestartstoring.NowIdon'tknowwhattodo,everybodystartslookingatme.
突然,那个电话响了,我不知道该怎么办,大家都看着我
Monica:
Andtheyweren'tlookingatyoubefore?
!
之前他们就不看着你?
!
Chandler:
Finally,IfigureI'dbetteranswerit,anditturnsoutit'smymother,whichisvery-veryweird,because-shenevercallsme!
最后,我觉得应该接这个电话,发现是我妈妈打来的,这十分怪因为….她从来不打电话给我!
[TimeLapse,Rosshasentered.]
Ross:
(mortified)Hi.
Joey:
Thisguysayshello,Iwannakillmyself.
这家伙说“你好”的时候,我总想杀了我自己
Monica:
Areyouokay,sweetie?
你还好吧?
Ross:
Ijustfeellikesomeonereacheddownmythroat,grabbedmysmallintestine,pulleditoutofmymouthandtieditaroundmyneck...
我就感觉好像某人伸手进我的喉咙,抓住我的小肠,从我的嘴里拉出来,再在我的脖子上打结…
Chandler:
Cookie?
要饼干吗?
Monica:
(explainingtotheothers)Carolmovedherstuffouttoday.
卡箩今天搬走了她的东西
Joey:
Ohh.
Monica:
(toRoss)Letmegetyousomecoffee.我给你拿咖啡
Ross:
Thanks.
Phoebe:
Ooh!
Oh!
(ShestartstopluckattheairjustinfrontofRoss.)
Ross:
No,nodon't!
Stopcleansingmyaura!
No,justleavemyauraalone,okay?
不,不要!
不要清理我的气息!
不要管我的气息,好吗?
Phoebe:
Fine!
Bemurky!
好呀!
继续痛苦吧!
Ross:
I'llbefine,alright?
Really,everyone.Ihopeshe'llbeveryhappy.
我会没事的,好吧?
.真的,各位,我希望她开心
Monica:
Noyoudon't.不,你并不希望
Ross:
NoIdon't,tohellwithher,sheleftme!
是的,我不希望!
去她的,她离开了我!
Joey:
Andyouneverknewshewasalesbian...
你又不知道她是女同性恋
Ross:
No!
!
Okay?
!
Whydoeseveryonekeepfixatingonthat?
Shedidn'tknow,howshouldIknow?
不知道!
!
行了吧?
!
为什么每个人老是提它?
她都不知道,我怎么会知道?
Chandler:
SometimesIwishIwasalesbian...(Theyallstareathim.)DidIsaythatoutloud?
有时候我希望我是女同性恋…我大声说出来啦?
Ross:
Itoldmomanddadlastnight,theyseemedtotakeitprettywell.
我昨晚告诉爸爸妈妈了,他们看起来没什么问题
Monica:
Ohreally,sothathystericalphonecallIgotfromawomanatsobbing3:
00A.M.,"I'llneverhavegrandchildren,I'llneverhavegrandchildren."waswhat?
Awrongnumber?
噢,真的吗?
那我凌晨三点接到一个女人打来的可笑电话,她在电话中抽泣说“我不会有孙子了,我不会有孙子了.”那是怎么回事?
打错电话啦?
Ross:
Sorry.
Joey:
AlrightRoss,look.You'refeelingalotofpainrightnow.You'reangry.You'rehurting.CanItellyouwhattheansweris?
没事的,罗斯,瞧.你现在感到很痛苦,你很生气.你感到伤心,我告诉你答案是什么?
(Rossgestureshisconsent.)
Joey:
Stripjoint!
C'mon,you'resingle!
Havesomehormones!
脱衣舞俱乐部!
别这样,你单身了!
有需求的!
Ross:
Idon'twanttobesingle,okay?
Ijust...Ijust-Ijustwannabemarriedagain!
我不想单身,好吗?
我只想….再次结婚!
(Rachelentersinawetweddingdressandstartstosearchtheroom.)
Chandler:
AndIjustwantamilliondollars!
(Heextendshishandhopefully.)
而我只想要100万美金!
Monica:
Rachel?
!
Rachel:
OhGodMonicahi!
ThankGod!
Ijustwenttoyourbuildingandyouweren'tthereandthenthisguywithabighammersaidyoumightbehereandyouare,youare!
噢,上帝,莫妮卡,你好,感谢上帝!
我刚到你那里去,而你不在,那个拿着大锤子的家伙说你可能在这里,你真在这里,你真在这里!
Waitress:
CanIgetyousomecoffee?
你想点咖啡吗?
Monica:
(pointingatRachel)De-caff.(toAll)Okay,everybody,thisisRachel,anotherLincolnHighsurvivor.(toRachel)Thisiseverybody,thisisChandler,andPhoebe,andJoey,and-youremembermybrotherRoss?
无咖啡因的,好了,各位,这位是瑞秋,另一个林肯高中的幸存者,这就是各位啦,这是钱德,菲比,乔伊.还有,你还记得我哥哥Ross吗?
Rachel:
Hi,sure!
Ross:
Hi.
(TheygotohugbutRoss'sumbrellaopens. Hesitsbackdowndefeatedagain. AmomentofsilencefollowsasRachelsitsandtheothersexpecthertoexplain.)
Monica:
Soyouwannatellusnow,orarewewaitingforfourwetbridesmaids?
那你现在可以告诉我们了吗,还是说我们在等着四位湿漉的伴娘?
Rachel:
OhGod...well,itstartedaboutahalfhourbeforethewedding.Iwasintheroomwherewewerekeepingallthepresents,andIwaslookingatthisgravyboat.ThisreallygorgeousLamaugegravyboat.Whenallofasudden-(tothewaitressthatbroughthercoffee)Sweet'n'Lo?
-IrealizedthatIwasmoreturnedonbythisgravyboatthanbyBarry!
AndthenIgotreallyfreakedout,andthat'swhenithitme:
howmuchBarrylookslikeMr.PotatoHead.Y'know,Imean,Ialwaysknewlookedfamiliar,but...Anyway,Ijusthadtogetoutofthere,andIstartedwondering'WhyamIdoingthis,andwhoamIdoingthisfor?
'.(toMonica)SoanywayIjustdidn'tknowwheretogo,andIknowthatyouandIhavekindadriftedapart,butyou'retheonlypersonIknewwholivedhereinthecity.
好吧,大概在婚礼前半个小时.我在礼品间里,我正看着那个船形卤肉盘.那是个非常好看的船形卤肉盘,然后,突然-(有糖吗?
)我发现我对这个船形卤肉盘比对Barry更有冲动!
然后我吓呆了,突然想到:
Barry看起来多象土豆头先生呀,我总是觉得他眼熟,但是…不管怎么说,我必须离开那里,我在想“我为什么这样做,我为谁这样做?
”我不知道该去哪里,而且我知道我和你有点疏远了,但你是我这个城市里唯一认识的人。
Monica:
Whowasn'tinvitedtothewedding.
还没有被邀请到婚礼上.
Rachel:
Ooh,Iwaskindahopingthatwouldn'tbeanissue...[Scene:
Monica'sApartment,everyoneisthereandwatchingaSpanishSoaponTVandaretryingtofigureoutwhatisgoingon.]
噢,我不希望提起这件事….
Monica:
NowI'mguessingthatheboughtherthebigpipeorgan,andshe'sreallynothappyaboutit.
我猜他给她买了个管风琴,而她很不喜欢那个。
Chandler:
(imitatingthecharacters)Tunaoreggsalad?
Decide!
吐拿鱼或鸡蛋沙拉?
快决定!
Ross:
(inadeepvoice)I'llhavewhateverChristineishaving.
“克莉丝汀吃什么我吃什么.”
Rachel:
(onphone)Daddy,Ijust...Ican'tmarryhim!
I'msorry.Ijustdon'tlovehim.Well,itmatterstome!
(ThesceneonTVhaschangedtoshowtwowomen,oneisholdingherhair.)
爸爸,我只是…不能嫁给他!
对不起,我只是不爱他了,这对我很有关系!
Phoebe:
IfIletgoofmyhair,myheadwillfalloff.Chandler:
(reTV)Ooh,sheshouldnotbewearingthosepants.
“如果我不抓着我的头发,我的头就会掉下来.”噢,她真不应该穿那条裤子
Joey:
Isaypushherdownthestairs.Phoebe,Ross,Chandler,andJoey:
Pushherdownthestairs!
Pushherdownthestairs!
Pushherdownthestairs!
我说把她推下楼,把她推下楼!
把她推下楼!
把她推下楼!
(Sheispusheddownthestairsandeveryonecheers.)
Rachel:
C'monDaddy,listentome!
It'slike,it'slike,allofmylife,everyonehasalwaystoldme,'You'reashoe!
You'reashoe,you'reashoe,you'reashoe!
'.AndtodayIjuststoppedandIsaid,'WhatifIdon'twannabeashoe?
WhatifIwannabea-apurse,y'know?
Ora-orahat!
No,I'mnotsayingIwantyoutobuymeahat,I'msayingIamaha-It'sametaphor,Daddy!
爸爸,听我说!
这就好像,在我一生中,所有人都告诉我,“你是鞋子!
”“你是鞋子,你是鞋子,你是鞋子!
”然后今天,我不这么认为了,对我自己说,'如果我不想成为鞋子呢?
如果我想成为一个包?
或一顶帽?
不,我不是让你给我买帽子,这是个比喻,爸爸!
Ross:
Youcanseewherehe'dhavetrouble.
你能发现他哪里出问题了
Rachel:
LookDaddy,it'smylife.WellmaybeI'lljuststayherewithMonica.
爸爸,这是我的生活,
Monica:
Well,Iguesswe'veestablishedwho'sstayingherewithMonica...
我猜我们已经确定,她和莫妮卡住在一起了…
Rachel:
Well,maybethat'smydecision.Well,maybeIdon'tneedyourmoney.Wait!
!
Wait,Isaidmaybe!
!
[TimeLapse,Rachelisbreatingintoapaperbag.]
也许我可以和莫妮卡住在一起,也许我不需要你的钱,等等!
我说也许!
!
Monica:
Justbreathe,breathe..that'sit.Justtrytothinkofnicecalmthings...Phoebe:
(sings)Raindropsonrosesandrabbitsandkittens,(RachelandMonicaturntolookather.)bluebellsandsleighbellsand-somethingwithmittens...Lalalala...somethingandnoodleswithstring. Theseareafew...
呼吸,呼吸,对啦,只想着一些让你镇定的好东西…玫瑰上的雨滴,还有猫的胡须,门铃和雪橇铃还有手套…啦啦啦,还有一些面条…
Rachel:
I'mallbetternow.我现在好多了
Phoebe:
(grinsandwalkstothekitchenandsaystoChandlerandJoey.)Ihelped!
我的功劳!
Monica:
Okay,look,thisisprobablyforthebest,y'know?
Independence.Takingcontrolofyourlife. Thewhole,'hat'thing.
瞧,这也许是最好的?
独立了,把握自己的生活.就像你说的“帽子”的事情。
Joey:
(comfortingher)Andhey,youneedanything,youcanalwayscometoJoey.MeandChandlerliveacrossthehall.Andhe'sawayalot.
还有,你还需要什么,你可以来找乔伊,我和钱德就住在对面.而且他经常不在.
Monica:
Joey,stophittingonher!
It'sherweddingday!
乔伊,不要再调戏她了!
今天是她结婚的日子!
Joey:
What,likethere'saruleorsomething?
怎么啦,难道这还有什么规定吗?
(ThedoorbuzzersoundsandChandlergetsit.)
Chandler:
Pleasedon'tdothatagain,it'sahorriblesound.
请不要再这么干,那是很讨厌的声音
Paul:
(overtheintercom)It's,uh,it'sPaul.
Monica:
OhGod,isit6:
30?
Buzzhimin!
天呀,到6:
30了吗?
让他进来!
Joey:
Who'sPaul?
Ross:
PaultheWineGuy,Paul?
保罗,调酒师,保罗?
Monica:
Maybe.Joey:
Wait.Your'notarealdate'tonightiswithPaultheWineGuy?
也许是吧,等等,你今晚的“不是真正约会”是和调酒师保罗?
Ross:
Hefinallyaskedyouout?
他终于约你出去啦?
Monica:
Yes!
Chandler:
Ooh,thisisaDearDiarymoment.
噢,真是个可以载入日记的时刻。
Monica:
Rach,wait,Icancancel...瑞秋,等等,我可以取消….
Rachel:
Please,no,go,that'dbefine!
不,别,你去吧,没什么的!
Monica:
(toRoss)Are,areyouokay?
Imean,doyouwantmetostay?
Ross,你还好吧?
你希望我留下来吗?
Ross:
(chokedvoice)That'dbegood...那会很好的…
Monica:
(horrified)Really?
Ross:
(normalvoice)No,goon!
It'sPaultheWineGuy!
不,去吧!
那可是调酒师保罗!
Phoebe:
Whatdoesthatmean?
Doeshesellit,drinkit,orjustcomplainalot?
(Chandlerdoesn'tknow.)
那是什么意思?
他卖酒,喝酒,还是抱怨酒?
(There'saknockonthedoor
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