1、所以,努力提高自己的实力会让自己更自信。 2、自我激励。在和自己对话的时候用积极正面的想法替换掉之前消极的想法。 已经有太多人认为我们做不到,认为我们不够好了,为什么我们自己也要那么想呢?要相信我是自己生活的主宰。如果自己都不相信,又会有谁相信呢? 3、远离那些会拖你后腿的人。 或许我们身边总是不乏这样的人,在我们追逐梦想的时候,总是冷嘲热讽。我们需要坚持梦想,不去听那些人的声音,等你爬的更高,那些声音也就听不到了。我们要多和志同道合、可以互相鼓励的人在一起。 4、给自己写自夸信,记录生命中辉煌的时刻。 写下自己的成就事件,当你意志消沉的时候就拿出来看看,就会发现其实自己也挺厉害的呢。 5、改
2、变自己的解读方式。多做正面、积极的解读。 如何帮助别人建立自信:恰当地夸赞别人做得好的地方,把注意力放在别人的优点上面。 | 英文演讲稿 | In my past life as a soccer coach, once you won a national championship, everyone wants to come play for you. Really not true. Once you paid them $25,000 a year in scholarships, everybody wants to come play for you. And parents w
3、ould always come to me and theyd say: Okay, my son or my daughter wants to come play at your university, what is it that we have to do? You know, what are you looking for? And being the Socratic professor that I am, I say, well, what does your son or daughter do? What do they do really well that wed
4、 be interested in? And typically their answers are, well, theyve got great vision. Theyre really good. They can see the entire field. Or, my daughter is the fastest player, theres nobody that can beat her. Or, my sons got a great left-footer. Really great in the air and can hit every ball. Im like:Y
5、eah, not bad; but to be quite honest with you, those are the last things Im looking for. The most important thing? Self-confidence.Without that skill, and I use the word skill intentionally, without that skill, we are useless as a soccer player. Because when you lose sight or belief in yourself, wer
6、e done for. I use the definition of self-confidence to be the ability or the belief to believe in yourself, to accomplish any task, no matter the odds, no matter the difficulty, no matter the adversity. The belief that you can accomplish it dash; self-confidence. Some of you are saying, Great, I don
7、t have it. Im so shy. Ill never do that, bla, bla, bla.And you start to drag all the way down here. But, I use the word skill because I believe it can be trained. And Ill show you a couple of ways in which we do. Hopefully I wont run out of time. I dont use any slides because my speech always goes h
8、ere, or here, or here. So well see which way we get to. The easiest way to build self-confidence: theres no magic button. I cant say:Hey, this plane is going down, who can fly? Put your hand up.I can, Im confident! Repetition, repetition, repetition. Right?What does Malcom Gladwell call it, the 10,0
9、00-hour rule? Theres no magic button. I recruited a goalie from Colombia, South America one year. Big, tall 63rime; man. You know, he had hands like stone. I thought he was like Flipper. Every time I threw him the ball, down, onto the ground. I was like, oh my god, were in trouble. Simple solution:
10、get to the wall, kick a ball against the wall and catch it. Kick the ball against the wall and catch it.His goal was 350 a day for eight months. He came back, his hands were calloused, the moisture on his hands were literally gone, he is now playing in Europe. Magic? No. Repetition, repetition, repe
11、tition.The problem is, we expect to be self-confident but we cant be unless the skill, or the task were doing, is not novel, is not new to us. We want to be in a situation where we have so much pressure in that and what I mean, because pressure builds diamonds, we want to be in a situation where Hey
12、, Ive done this a thousand times. I did my speech, and I practiced in front of a mirror: bla, bla, bla, bla, bla, bla. Hey Im sounding good. And then I went in front of my kids, and my wife. I said, oh gosh, I got a little nervous. Then Id get in front of Glenn Gould, Oh my goodness, I am a little m
13、ore nervous! By the time I get to the ACG, where 2,500 people, cant say anymore, right? Twenty-five hundred people, where twenty-five hundred people are there, I wont have a single ounce of nervousness because of my ability to practice. Right? Over, and over, and over, again. The problem with repeti
14、tion is: how many of us bail after the first bit of failure? How many of us bail after the first bit of adversity? Edison was on that video, and it depends who you ask, theres anywhere from 1,000 to 10,000 tries to build that light bulb. 1,000 to 10,000. J.K Rowling should be on that video. Do you k
15、now how many publishers she took her Harry Potter book to? I believe the number was 12 or 13I am pretty confident but after two or three nos Id be like:damn it! After six or seven, Imaybe not! Definitely after nine or ten, Id be looking to be a soccer coach or something else besides an author. Right
16、? I mean, twelve times somebody said no. But, practice, practice, practice, and do not accept failure. Maybe it shouldnt be repetition, maybe the answer should be persistence. Because we all repeat something but very few of us really will persist. So thats one way to build self-confidence. Get out t
17、here. Do what you want to do and do not accept no.The other one is self-talk. We all have a self-talk tape that plays in our head. Anybody go shopping and put on a pair of pants this week? If youre a woman, the first thing that always comes:Damn I look fat in these pants!. And if youre a man, its th
18、e opposite:Oh god, I got no muscle, Im so flabby! Right? We all have this tape that plays in our head.As a student, if they asked me the question, it was like:Oh, gee please professor dont pick me, I dont know the answer.d look down. Right?re in the bwhen I, let me tell you something, and the VP of
19、business admin is here, I shouldnt repeat this, but when they hired me as an athletics director, I sat in an architects meeting, and I am as dumb as a post when it comes to anything to do with numbers and angles. And they are like: the fundibulator valve of the architectural, uh, what do you think d
20、octor Joseph? Uh, let me look into that for you and get back to you. Right? I was in a, oh god god, please dont ask me, please dont ask me. We all have this negative self-talk that goes in our head. Guess what?s enough people that are telling us we cant do it. That were not good enough. Why do we wa
21、nt to tell ourselves that? We know for a fact that thoughts influence actions. We saw it there with the video Sheldon, Dr. Levy showed. We know that our thoughts influence actions, why do we want to say that negative self-talk to ourselves? We need to get our own self-affirmations. Muhammad Ali, wha
22、t was his self-affirmation? I am the greatest! Who else is going to tell you? There need to be quiet moments in your bedroom, quiet moments when youre brushing your teeth. That we need to reaffirm:I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate! That is my affirmation. I came from a school of
23、one thousand people, I lived in a town of one thousand people for fifteen years;s no reason that I should be in charge of an Athletics department, building maple leaf gardens. But I am the captain of my ship and the master of my fate. If I dont say it, if I dont believe it, no one else will.How do y
24、ou build self-confidence? Get away from the people who will tear you down. Theres enough of that. Muhammad Ali, I am the greatest! There is no one better than me. Theres a difference between hubris, and ego, and false pride. Its just reminding yourself in quiet silent moments, I put it down on a lis
25、t, its right beside my mirror, right? about all the things that make me who I am. Because I make enough mistakes, and the newspapers will recognize it, and people around me will recognize it; and theyll tear me down, and pretty soon Ill begin to believe it. There was a time when my confidence was re
26、ally low. There was a time when I took this job when I came from Iowa, I dont know if I could do it. I had to bring out my self-confidence letter. A letter I wrote to myself when I was feeling good. Ivan, congratulations on getting your PhD before 40. CongraI am 40, under. Congratulations on winning
27、 a national championship. Good job on raising three good kids and marrying the right woman. I wrote a letter to myself, it was my own brag sheet. My own letter about the things I was proud of. Because there are moments, and well all experience them in our career, in our lives, in our job hunting, in
28、 our relationships; when we are not feeling good about who, and what, and where we are. And I had to bring out that letter and read it time and time again, for a period of about two weeks, to weather me through that storm. It was important. Stop the negative self-talk. If you watch youll see some at
29、hletes that have a little bandage, or a little brand around them. Lance Armstrong is a perfect one. Whats his self-affirmation? Livestrong isnt a brand, it was to remind him of who he was. Live strong. Then it became a brand. He would move that from one arm to the next arm, when doubt and fear came
30、into his mind. Live strong, put it on there, lets go. Well all have it, we place it. Two ways to build self-confidence. Im worried about my time, Im going to tell you of one way you can build self-confidence in others. We are coaches and educators, we are teachers, we are people who will create valu
31、e in the world; and in doing that, we are critical by the nature of what we do. I am a coach, I want you to score a goal. The ball went over high. Dang it! The ball went high!Thank you coach, I know that. Feedback tells me that. So what do we do? I need you to put your elbow here, I need you to put your knee over the ball, I need you to follow through. Boom. Land. Great. Notice, I never made it as a prof