1、生活大爆炸英文剧本第二季12Script compiled bywww.big-bang-forum.deTHE address for geeks and The Big Bang Theory“ fans!THE BIG BANG THEORYbyChuck Lorre & Bill PradySeason 1, Episode 2 (s01e02)Title: The Big Bran Hypothesis- Dialog only -LEONARDHere you go. Pad thai, no peanuts.HOWARDDoes it have peanut oil?LEONAR
2、DIm not sure. Everyone keep an eye on Howard in case he starts to swell up.SHELDONSince its not bee season, you can have my epinephrine.RAJESHAre there any chopsticks?SHELDONYou dont need chopsticks. This is Thai food.LEONARDHere we go.SHELDONThailand has had the fork since the latter half of the 19
3、th century. Interestingly they dont put the fork in their mouth they use it to put the food on a spoon which then goes into their mouth.LEONARDAsk him for a napkin, I dare you. Ill get it.HOWARDDo I look puffy? I feel puffy.PENNYHey, Leonard.LEONARDOh, hi, Penny.PENNYAm I interrupting?LEONARDNo.SHEL
4、DONYoure not swelling, Howard.HOWARDNo, no, look at my fingers. Theyre like Vienna sausages.PENNYSounds like you have company.LEONARDTheyre not going anywhere. So, youre coming home from work. Thats great. How was work?PENNYWell, you know, its a Cheesecake Factory. People order cheesecake and I brin
5、g it to em.LEONARDSo you kind of act as like a carbohydrate delivery system?PENNYMm. Yeah, call it whatever you want, I get minimum wage. Yeah. Um, anyways I was wondering if you could help me out with something, Im kinda.LEONARDYes.PENNYOh. Okay, great, Im having some furniture delivered tomorrow a
6、nd I may not be here, so, oh. Hello.HOWARDspeaks in RussianPENNYIm sorry?HOWARDHavent you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian?PENNYNo, I havent.HOWARDGet used to it.PENNYYeah, I probably wont. Hey, Sheldon.SHELDONHi.PENNYHey, Raj. Still not talking to me, huh?SHELDONDont take it
7、 personally, its his pathology. He cant talk to women.HOWARDHe cant talk to atractive women, or in your case, a cheesecake- scented goddess.LEONARDSo theres gonna be some furniture delivered?PENNYYeah, yeah. If it gets here and Im not here tomorrow, could you just sign for it and have them put it in
8、 my apartment?LEONARDYeah, no problem.PENNYGreat, heres my spare key. Thank you.LEONARDPenny, wait.PENNYYeah?LEONARDUm. If you dont have any other plans, do you want to join us for Thai food and a Superman movie marathon?PENNYA marathon? Wow, how many Superman movies are there?SHELDONYoure kidding,
9、right?PENNYYeah, I do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter and Superman swooshes down and catches her. Which one was that?LEONARD, SHELDON, HOWARD, RAJESHOne.SHELDONYou realize that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy.PENNYYes, I know, men cant fly.SHELDONNo, no. Lets assume
10、that they can. Ahem. Lois Lane is falling. Accelerating at an initial rate of 32 feet per second per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Miss Lane, who is now traveling at approximately 120 miles an hour, hits them and is immediately sliced into three equal pi
11、eces.LEONARDUnless Superman matches her speed and decelerates.SHELDONIn what space, sir? In what space? Shes 2 feet above the ground. Yeah, frankly, if he really loved her, hed let her hit the pavement. Itd be a more merciful death.LEONARDExcuse me, your entire argument is predicated on the assumpti
12、on that Supermans flight is a feat of strength.SHELDONAre you listening to yourself? It is well established that Supermans flight is a feat of strength. It is an extension of his ability to leap tall buildings, an ability he derives from exposure to Earths yellow sun.HOWARDYeah and you dont have a p
13、roblem with that? How does he fly at night?SHELDONOh. A combination of the moons solar reflection and the energy-storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells.PENNYIm just gonna go wash up.LEONARDI have 2600 comic books in there. I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells.SHELDO
14、NChallenge accepted. Were locked out.RAJESHAlso, the pretty girl left.= THEME SONG =LEONARDOkay. Her apartments on the fourth floor, but the elevators broken, so youre gonna have to. Oh, yourre just gonna be done? Okay, cool, thanks. I guess well just bring it up ourselves.SHELDONI hardly think so.L
15、EONARDWhy not?SHELDONWell, we dont have a dolly or lifting belts or any measurable upper-body strength.LEONARDWe dont need strength. Were physicists. We are the intellectual descendants of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the Earth. Its just a matter. I dont have this. I dont
16、 have this! I dont have this.SHELDONArchimedes would be so proud.LEONARDDo you have any ideas?SHELDONYes, but they all involve a Green Lantern and a power ring.LEONARDEasy.SHELDONEasy.LEONARDOkay. Now weve got an inclined plane. The force required to lift is reduced by the sine of the angle of the s
17、tairs, call it 30 degrees, so, about half.SHELDONExactly half.LEONARDExactly half. Lets push. Okay. See, its moving. This is easy. Its all in the math.SHELDONWhats your formula for the corner?LEONARDWhat? Oh, okay. Ah. Okay, yeah, no problem. Just come up here, help me pull and turn.SHELDONAh, gravi
18、ty, thou art a heartless bitch. You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of you having sexual congress with this woman.LEONARDMen do things for women without expecting sex.SHELDONYeah, those would be men who just had sex.LEONARDIm doing this to be a good neighbor. In
19、any case, theres no way it could lower the odds. Almost there. Almost there. Almost there.SHELDONNo, were not.LEONARDIm sorry.SHELDONNo, were not! No, were not! Watch your fingers. Watch your fingers.LEONARDYeah.SHELDONOh God, my fingers!LEONARDYou okay?SHELDONNo, it hurt. Great Caesars ghost, look
20、at this place.LEONARDSo Penny is a little messy.SHELDONA little messy? The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy. This is chaos. Excuse me. Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid. Im just inferring this is a couch because the evidence sugges
21、ts the coffee table is having a tiny garage sale.LEONARDDid it ever occur to you that not everyone has the compulsive need to sort, organize and label the entire world around them?SHELDONNo.LEONARDWell, they dont. Hard as it may be for you to believe, most people dont sort their breakfast cereal num
22、erically by fiber content.SHELDONExcuse me, but I think weve both found that helpful at times.LEONARDCome on, we should go.SHELDONHang on.LEONARDWhat are you doing?SHELDONIm straightening up.LEONARDSheldon, this is not your home.SHELDONThis is not anyones home. This is a swirling vortex of entropy.L
23、EONARDWhen the transvestite lived here, you didnt care how he kept the place.SHELDONBecause it was immaculate. I mean, you opened that mans closet, it was left to right, evening gowns, cocktail dresses, then his police uniforms.LEONARDWhat were you doing in his closet?SHELDONI helped him run some ca
24、ble for a webcam.PENNYHey, guys.LEONARDOh, hey, Penny. This just arrived. We just brought this up. Just now.PENNYGreat. Oh, was it hard getting it up the stairs?LEONARDNo.SHELDONNo?LEONARDNo.SHELDONNo.LEONARDWell, well get out of your hair.PENNYOkay, great. Thank you again.SHELDONPenny. Ahem. I just
25、 want you to know that you dont have to live like this. Im here for you.PENNYWhats he talking about?LEONARDIts a joke.PENNYI dont get it.LEONARDYeah, he didnt tell it right. Sheldon? Sheldon? Hello? Sheldon!SHELDONShh! Pennys sleeping.LEONARDAre you insane? You cant just break into a womans apartmen
26、t in the middle of the night and clean.SHELDONI had no choice. I couldnt sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom was our living room, and just outside our living room was that hallway,and immediately adjacent to the hallway was. this.LEONARDDo you realize that if Penny wakes up, there is no reaso
27、nable explanation as to why were here.SHELDONI just gave you a reasonable explanation.LEONARDNo, no. You gave me an explanation. Its reasonableness will be determined by a jury of your peers.SHELDONDont be ridiculous. I have no peers.LEONARDSheldon, we have to get out of here.SHELDONYou might want t
28、o speak in a lower register.LEONARDWhat?SHELDONEvolution has made women sensitive to high-pitched noises while they sleep so that theyll be roused by a crying baby. If you want to avoid waking her, speak in a lower register.LEONARDThats ridiculous!SHELDONNo, thats ridiculous.LEONARDFine. I accept yo
29、ur premise. Now, please, lets go.SHELDONIm not leaving until Im done.LEONARDOh, no.SHELDONIf you have time to lean, you have time to clean.LEONARDOh, what the hell.SHELDONGood morning.LEONARDMorning.SHELDONI have to say I slept splendidly. Granted not long, but just deeply and well.LEONARDIm not sur
30、prised. A well-known folk cure for insomnia is to break in your neighbors apartment and clean.SHELDONSarcasm?LEONARDYou think?SHELDONGranted, my methods may have been somewhat unorthodox, but I think the end result will be a measurable enhancement to Pennys quality of life.LEONARDYou know what, you convinced me. Maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet.SHELDONYou dont think that crosses a line?LEONARDYes. For Gods sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I ope
